* Please have mercy not to preach me about hope & despair; sometimes things are not to be seen from that perspective. Sometimes we need to give space & consideration for human weakness.
Once upon a time there was a gem that was born in a shell & has lived there ever since it was born. Then one day it heard a very nice sound outside, so it decided to go out & see what is going on out there. The gem got out of the shell; it saw a huge bird with colorful feathers singing a very touching melody. The bird noticed the little gem standing beside it, & thinking it was a grain the bird hit the gem with its beak & was about to eat it. The scared little gem rushed quickly back to its shell deciding not to go out again ever from its shell.
Now the years have passed, the gem has been living inside its shell & got used to its life that way. Until one day it heard another nice melody out there. This new melody reminded it of the old experience & it realized some thing about itself that it didn’t know before; this gem is not the type whose wounds heal. They just cover themselves or hide in a closed box until, for some reason, are uncovered again & they start aching like before. It realized also that by the passage of time, the shell has become harder from the outside with the gem inside, & the harder the shell becomes the weaker the gem becomes.
The poor gem didn’t know what to do. Would it go out & risk its life again, or would it just ignore this new melody as it sounds exactly like the one before. “Maybe it’s a kind bird, maybe it’s a bad bird... What to do? What to do?” the poor confused gem kept thinking. With bleeding wounds of the past, present fears & an aching heart with all these burdens carried on its weak shoulders, the little gem kept moving in circles around its shell thinking & thinking & thinking. “Maybe I’m too weak, maybe I shouldn’t risk my present safe & peaceful life, maybe I should ignore the nice touching melody outside…”. The gem kept moving & moving in circles until it got so tired & so exhausted & so consumed by confusion. At some point it broke down, fell on the floor, wept, cried, sobbed painfully.
The gem was too weak to try
The gem had to cry
The gem had to dry
The gem had to die